#And my ass is made of chicken

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) (p.b.u.h) said, "Any person who takes a bath on Friday like the bath of Janaba and then goes for the prayer (in the first hour i.e. early), it is as if he had sacrificed a camel (in Allah's cause); and whoever goes in the second hour it is as if he had sacrificed a cow; and whoever goes in the third hour, then it is as if he had sacrificed a horned ram; and if one goes in the fourth hour, then it is as if he had sacrificed a hen; and whoever goes in the fifth hour then it is as if he had offered an egg. When the Imam comes out (i.e. starts delivering the Khutba), the angels present themselves to listen to the Khutba."

Narrated `Abdullah

A person was mentioned before the Prophet (p.b.u.h) and he was told that he had kept on sleeping till morning and had not got up for the prayer. The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Satan urinated in his ears."

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "When the call for prayer is made, Satan takes to his heels passing wind (he farts) so that he may not hear the Adhan and when the call is finished he comes back, and when the Iqama is pronounced, Satan again takes to his heels, and when the Iqama is finished he comes back again and tries to interfere with the person and his thoughts and say, "Remember this and that (which he has not thought of before the prayer)", till the praying person forgets how much he has prayed. If anyone of you does not remember whether he has offered three or four rak`at then he should perform two prostrations of Sahu while sitting.

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "The congregational prayer of anyone amongst you is more than twenty five (or twenty seven) times in reward than his prayer in the market or in his house, for if he performs ablution completely and then goes to the mosque with the sole intention of performing the prayer, and nothing urges him to proceed to the mosque except the prayer, then, on every step which he takes towards the mosque, he will be raised one degree or one of his sins will be forgiven. The angels will keep on asking Allah's forgiveness and blessings for everyone of you so long as he keeps sitting at his praying place. The angels will say, 'O Allah, bless him! O Allah, be merciful to him!' as long as he does not do Hadath (fart) or a thing which gives trouble to the other." The Prophet (ﷺ) further said, "One is regarded in prayer so long as one is waiting for the prayer."

Narrated `Abdur-Rahman bin Abu Bakr

We were one-hundred and thirty persons accompanying the Prophet (ﷺ) who asked us whether anyone of us had food. There was a man who had about a Sa of wheat which was mixed with water then. A very tall pagan came driving sheep. The Prophet (ﷺ) asked him, "Will you sell us (a sheep) or give it as a present?" He said, "I will sell you (a sheep)." The Prophet (ﷺ) bought a sheep and it was slaughtered. The Prophet ordered that its liver and other Abdominal organs be roasted. By Allah, the Prophet (ﷺ) gave every person of the one-hundred-and-thirty a piece of that; he gave all those of them who were present; and kept the shares of those who were absent. The Prophet (ﷺ) then put its meat in two huge basins and all of them ate to their fill, and even then more food was left in the two basins which were carried on the camel (or said something like it).

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "The (Hell) Fire complained to its Lord saying, 'O my Lord! My different parts eat up each other.' So, He allowed it to take two breaths, one in the winter and the other in summer, and this is the reason for the severe heat and the bitter cold you find (in weather).

Narrated Ibn `Umar

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Fever is from the heat of the (Hell) Fire; so abate fever with water."

Narrated Abu Qatada

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "A good dream is from Allah, and a bad or evil dream is from Satan; so if anyone of you has a bad dream of which he gets afraid, he should spit on his left side and should seek Refuge with Allah from its evil, for then it will not harm him."

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "When the Imam says: 'Ghair-il-Maghdubi `alaihim Walad-Dallin (i.e. not the path of those who earn Your Anger, nor the path of those who went astray (1.7)), then you must say, 'Ameen', for if one's utterance of 'Ameen' coincides with that of the angels, then his past sins will be forgiven."

Narrated Sahl bin Sa`d

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Whoever guarantees me (the chastity of) what is between his legs (i.e. his private parts), and what is between his jaws (i.e., his tongue), I guarantee him Paradise."

“A'isha (Allah be pleased with, her) reported that it had been revealed in the Holy Qur'an that ten clear sucklings make the marriage unlawful, then it was abrogated (and substituted) by five sucklings and Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) died and it was before that time (found) in the Holy Qur'an (and recited by the Muslims).”